They say there are two important dates in a person’s life: The day they are born and the day they find out why.
I’ve struggled with that second part a lot and have felt lost for a few years, as you may have read in my previous post. The Rise Women’s Conference gave me the clarity I was so desperately searching for. Back to my roots, if you will.
Helping women (and men) overcome Binge Eating Disorder. It’s the thing that makes me tick. It gets my energy up. It makes me want to stay awake and do all the things required to get to where I want to be. I have found out the reason I was put on this Earth: To help other people and to let them know that there is a way out of the suffering. To give them hope. To show them that they aren’t alone. To be there when they fall and help encourage them to get back up and keep going. To show them that they have the power… and have had it all along.
There are a lot of questions I get, but the main one is how to lose weight. Let me just explain that losing the added weight will come naturally and that shouldn’t be the focus right off the bat. The focus should be figuring out the why: Why you cope with food? What triggers send you off into a binge? You have to figure out the root of why you binge eat because if you don’t you will just continuously fall back and binge. You have to really understand your mindset and why its coping mechanism is a lot of food.
Lots of times this can be discovered from thinking back to your past experiences and habits. If nothing in your past really stands out, then journalling is a great tool to help you realize your patterns when it comes to food. For example, do you typically binge eat when you are feeling really lonely? If so, you can create a new action for that mood. Instead of turning to food, maybe you join a social group or decide to call your best friend to catch up. The more you repeat the new action, the more the old will start to take a backseat. The trigger of being lonely will still be there, but it is how you react to that trigger that starts to change your habits.
Once I figured out why I binged, things started to change and that was mostly because it was apparent that I was ready for a change. A lot of this is mindset work and creating new habits to replace the old ones. If you aren’t ready to change, you won’t change. Period. When you start to put it out there that you want help, you will take notice of all the people and thoughts that are trying to help push you on your way.
I went to therapy and just started to talk as you do in therapy. Prior to going in, I wasn’t really sure why I binge ate, but the more I focused on sharing my feelings (good & bad) and the more I was in tune with myself in times of need by journalling, I was able to see what was holding me back. Once I saw a pattern, I was able to come up with new actions instead of bingeing. Those new actions worked some of the time and, to be honest, at least in the beginning, sometimes they didn’t work. Sometimes there was guilt when they didn’t work, so I journaled about how that made me feel. Sometimes I wondered “why me?” and let myself feel sorry for a few moments… because those feelings are really real. However, I knew deep down that I was stronger than binge eating disorder. I knew with every fiber of my being that I would be a success story, although I wasn’t sure exactly how long that would take.
And that part doesn’t really matter.
It might take 6 months for one person & 2 years for another. The timing doesn’t matter. All that matters is that you are constantly working towards bettering yourself and coming up with new habits to take the place of the old ones. Give yourself time and allow yourself plenty of grace. You’ll get there!
* If you have questions, are interested in doing an ecourse, or are interested in coaching, please send me a message Kristin(at)FabFitBeauty.com so that we can see if we are a good fit for one another. It is my mission in life to help everyone I can who is suffering with Binge Eating Disorder and not living the life they should be living.